‘The bodies we desire’

What does that mean? How does one desire a ‘body’, when one has never experienced that body? How can I desire breasts when I have no idea what having breasts feels like?

It’s a nonsensical statement as soon as we think about it; the reality is that what you desire must be what the body *represents* for you. The true desire (whether you know it or not), must be a desire for something deeper. I might desire a taller body, because that represents status, or power, or confidence, or attractiveness. I might desire breasts because that represents sexuality, or sexual excitement, or comfort, or beauty, or nurturing. I want the *vision of myself with breasts* (whatever that means to me), not the breasts themselves.

The reality is that ‘bodies’, as we envision them, are full of social ramifications. If you claim that you desire a body for its own sake, then you are claiming that you, somehow, through some unknown process, know what it feels like to have that body part and a;so have an instinct which craves it. That approach is, basically, voodoo. You can believe it, but it’s unproven and unprovable, and is akin to a mystical experience. Totally cool if you think it’s true, but unreallistic to expect everyone to buy in.

And please don’t misunderstand: I am NOT denying that you/others have the feelings/desires for another body, or another gender. I think those feelings are usually very real. But I think they are feelings for what those parts symbolize (ie: what gender stereotypes they correlate with) rather than the parts themselves. And it’s probably very difficult to dig down and uncover how all that ties together; our minds, experiences, histories, traumas, and associations are messy.